I Won't, I Won't, I Won't... Raise a Spoiled Brat!

One stereotype of an only child is that he/she is spoiled. In some cases, yes that is true. In my second year of teaching, my class contained mainly only children. The problem with that was many of them had a problem when I told them, "No." That class was a major turning point in my decision to have more than one child. I wish I had known at the time that the child behaves as a result of how the parent interacts with their child. It is very difficult to have only one child and not give them anything they want. After all, he/she is your only child. There is a huge difference between being spoiled and being a spoiled brat. Brodie is spoiled, in that he gets a great deal of what he wants. For birthdays and Christmas, he gets pretty much what he asks for. But, when it comes to being a spoiled brat... that he is not!!! I'm surprised Brodie's first word wasn't "No." He has boundaries with us as parents, and we discipline home when he crosses that line. At the beginning of this school year, Brodie wasn't performing at his level. His French teacher talked to me, and she said that Brodie was messing around in class. Scot and I took away his TV, wii, iPod, and anything electronic. Let me tell you, Brodie made a complete turn-around. We haven't had a problem since. You're probably thinking, "Wow, that's harsh. Just for one little problem." Well, we can handle things in school that Brodie has no control over, but messing around in class I don't tolerate. As a teacher, I can deal with not understanding material, but when students don't even make an attempt to do the work or mess around in class, that is unacceptable. So, when my child messes around in class, I'm not a very happy parent. Scot and I have been able to do the best we can to find the right balance in raising a healthy, yet spoiled child. ;)

Brodie at Shaver Lake 2013

The Perks of Grandma

As I sit here writing this, I am anxiously awaiting the hour and minute that Brodie goes to Grandma's house to stay the night.  Scot and I are so lucky to have a relative (Scot's mom) who absolutely adores and loves Brodie.  Aside from her teaching job, she is willing to watch Brodie any day, any hour, any time.  Now, I think that if we had more than one child, that would be different.  Brodie is so easy going and a VERY good child.  Yes, he has his moments... But, overall he is a darn good kiddo. In my experience as a teacher, I have seen all too well the different personalities and character traits of siblings.  One sibling is usually the "good" one and one is the "handful" child.  Well, since Brodie is such a good child, I have to assume that our next one would've been a handful.  If we had a girl, she would've had an attitude.  If our hypothetical girl acted like me when I was in junior high and high school, let's just say, one of us would not be alive to see the future.  I am so grateful that Grandma is so willing to take in Brodie on a spur of the moment decision.  It's very easy to pawn off one child as opposed to two or three.  I've noticed that in my classes as well.  When I have had 7 great easy going students, teachers are more than willing to keep an eye on them for an emergency doctor's appt. or something else as opposed to 10 unruly students. It's like the students have the plague and it's impossible to get rid of them for a few minutes. But, all I all... I am thankful that Brodie is such a good child so it can be easy to get Grandma to watch him for an afternoon. And on that note.. It's time for Brodie to go visit Grandma!!!

Brodie and Grandma camping!!!

Homework and Helicopter Parents

One of the hardest things as a parent (aside from keeping my sanity) is knowing when to keep my nose out of Brodie's homework.  I am a perfectionist...so it is VERY difficult to sit back and watch him do things as his own individual person.  I am also a person who likes to complete tasks quickly.  Scot & Brodie are two of the slowest people I know.  They DON'T know how to hurry.  Watching Brodie do homework can be one of the most nerve-wracking things I do all day...and really, I don't sit there and physically watch him.  It's more of a I can feel that he's not doing his homework.  That drives me crazy!  I could not imagine having to keep track of two or three children's homework.  As a teacher, I see all kinds of parents.  I have even had the parent of a 6th grader write his name on his homework for him.  I was determined not to be a helicopter mom.  I believe in keeping close tabs on your child(ren), but hovering over them and not allowing them to make mistakes is detrimental to their growth & development.  Yes, it is very difficult to sit back while you know your child is going to make a mistake, but that is what learning is for.  Brodie started doing book reports last year in 1st grade.  I had to help him through each one, but he wrote each and every last word.  This year he has already completed 3 book reports and by the end of the written portion, I want to pull out my hair.  But, I do not tell him what to write; I help him with the structure of the sentences.  I really and truly have no idea how parents of more than one child can give that much attention to each of their children.  Well, some parents don't.  They are either lazy or are too busy, and in that case, stop having babies!!!!

How Our Only Came to be: A Background

My husband Scot and I have one son named Brodie.  He is our pride and joy; our ONE and ONLY pride and joy.  Here is a bit of history of how our only child came to be.  Brodie was yanked into this world at 8:52 pm on August 3, 2005.  When I say yanked, I mean 2 doctors practically did CPR on my upper abdomen to pull him out forcefully via c-section.  Fast forward a week through the hell of recovering from the surgery, and I began suffering from severe postpartum depression(I was put on medication for a few months).  My pregnancy and Brodie's first year were HELL, to put it mildly.  Before having Brodie, I wanted four children... in the first year after Brodie, that number dwindled to 2.  I wanted at least 2 children so Brodie would have a "playmate."  Well, in February of 2007, I became pregnant again.  Much to my dismay (at the time), that one ended as my 1st pregnancy had... as a miscarriage.  I was devastated.   I couldn't figure out why this was happening to me.  But, after the D & C, I had the attitude of everything happens for a reason.  At the time, I just couldn't figure out the reason.  I played around with the notion that maybe having the miscarriage was for the best and maybe we were only meant to have one child.  Have I mentioned that my husband and I have NO patience and slight anger problems?  One example of this is... when we were driving home from the hospital, Brodie was screaming and ScReAmInG.  Scot didn't tell me until some time later that that was the moment when HE decided he only wanted one child.  I sometimes feel bad that Brodie only has us to play with at home.  One day, recently, I asked him, "Would you want a brother or sister?"  He told me that he would.  My response was, "Well, you would have to share your toys with him/her and we wouldn't be able to go on as many trips, like to Disneyland.  So, would you want a brother or sister?"  His response was an immediate, "NO!"  Until next time!!!

Brodie (now 7 years old) on his 1st hike to the Vernal Falls Footbridge in Yosemite